{20th August 2011}
My heart is like apple pie.
It looks pretty good on the outside. But on the inside - I'm a mess. And I don't even know it.
All I know is that my insides are all a mess.
And I need Him more.

I've come back to that
apple pie heart. bitter-sweet tart.
It's difficult.
Sometimes I myself struggling to accept that He still wants me despite all the burnt corners and flaky pastry and crumbling dough. When I keep coming back into His arms only to wander away again. How deep is His grace? How far does His love go? How many second chances are too many?

I am reminded.

He is jealous for me. His Love's like a hurricane, I am a tree, bending beneath the weight of His wind and glory.
When all of a sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory- And I realize just how beautiful You are,
and how great Your affections are for me.

And oh, how He loves us, oh -
Oh, how He loves us,
How He loves us all.

And we are His portion and He is our prize, drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes -
If His grace is an ocean, we are all sinking.

and Heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss,
and my heart turns violently inside of my chest,
and I don't have time to maintain these regrets,
When I think about the way...

He loves us,
Oh, how He loves us,
Oh, how He loves us,
Oh, how He loves.