2011 Resolutions

This is a tough one you know! I really love doing resolutions, but I don't like to be super specific with them because I end up never fulfilling them haha. For the upcoming year, all I really want is to be the perfect faithful daughter (which is impossible haha!) and to have a closer relationship with God. I know my Christian walk with Him will never be perfect, there will be times where I feel like He's not even there for me (which isn't true, He's always there!) but I just want to be a faithful daughter, ready to do His work and walk in His will. Although all I can do is pray that He gives me the faith, strength, boldness and love to do whatever He wants me to do, I'm really excited for the new year with Him! Even though Resolutions aren't something that you have to live by, I feel that resolutions are there to remind you what your purposes are (Although sometimes God has a way of changing your purposes...) & what you're aiming for.

In all the things I do; be it serving, worshiping, helping, talking, making new friends, studies, everything; I just really wanna do it like I'm doing it for God! Like wholeheartedly. Its hard, especially when maybe you're working with people you don't like, or you're doing something you don't like, or you're just plain tired and worn out..

Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. (Colossians 3:15-17)

But there you have it in the Bible :) Do all things for God. For 2011, I want to do all things for God. It ain't gonna be easy and I'll most probably definitely fail, but with Jesus all things are possible ;)

End-of-Year Tag :)

So I did this tag at the end of 2008 and at the end of 2009, time to do it again :)

In 2010...

Did you do something you would never do?
Well yeah, now that I think of it. Brought my Bible to school, discussed Christianity in class & prayed with my friends in school. I would have never imagined I would do something as crazy as that this year..

Did you keep any New Year's Resolutions?
I had to really go dig into my journal to find my 2010 Resolutions! My resolution this year was to Live by God's Word. Now that I look back, I don't really get what I wrote LOL. What does it even mean to live by God's word?

Did anyone close to you give birth?
Erm.. No.

Did anyone close to you die?
No.

Did you visit any countries?
No.

What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010?
Hmm! A closer relationship with Jesus? :D

Will any date from 2010 stay etched in your memory forever?
Oh.. Yes :)

What was your biggest achievement of 2010?
Straight A's for PMR? FINALLY AN ACHIEVEMENT IN MY LIFE! i have sadly not a lot of achievements....

What was your biggest failure?
Not sure. Err. Probably the piano lol

Did you suffer illness or injury?
I got sick a lot of times this year :( I think I had fever about 4 or 5 times.

What was the best thing you bought in '09?
Jeans! Yay!

Did your behavior change over the year?
Yeah..

Where did you spend most of your money?
Buying gifts for friends haha. AND MOSTLY FOOD. GEEZZZZ.

Are you happier than this time last year?
Yeah, I think I am :)

What song will remind you of 2010?
No special song! I don't listen to music sadly.

What do you wish you would have done more of?
Hmmm :) Praying?

What do you wish you would have done less of?
Computer!

What did you do for Christmas '10?
I spent countdown with EmBaCy youth :) And the rest of the day at home till Church!

Did you fall in love in 2010?
I fell in love with Jesus all over again..

Did you get your heart broken in 2010?
Got my heart broken by Jesus too :) But for all the good reasons.

Cried over a guy/girl?
Haha yeah! Funniest thing ever. I remember slapping Othniel too and crying after that because he scared me. Does that count?

Favorite TV programs of '10?
I... sadly do not watch tv.

Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
No :)

What was the best book you read and/or movie you saw?
The Bible! I hardly watched movies this year lol. Can't even remember the last movie I watched.

What was your greatest discovery?
That YESSSSS, JESUS LOVES ME~

What did you do on your birthday and how old were you?
I was 15 on the 14th of July! I don't recall doing much :) Went to school. I remember Eric not giving me a present.....

What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
I think this year has been really satisfying!

How would you describe your personal fashion concept of 2010?
"If its not comfortable....... Don't wear it."

Which explains why I was in tees and jeans/shorts the whole year round except during christmas where I finally wore a dress.

Friends

Who was the best new person you met?
Jesus! Haha!

Who did you wish you did not meet?
Lol I'm glad I met everyone that I met this year :)

Who was your best friend?
Jesus :)

Who was your enemy?
Oh I don't know... I don't think I have one. Satan? :)

Who do you miss?
Schoolmates! I haven't seen them for like 3 months!

Who will you never forget?
I'll never forget everyone hahahaha

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010:
LISTEN TO THE HOLY SPIRIT. JUST SHUT UP AND FREAKING LISTEN AND DO WHAT THE HOLY SPIRIT TELLS YOU TO DO, OR ELSE MAJOR REGRETS ARE GONNA HAPPEN.

What will you always remember about 2010?
Oh.. How Jesus has worked :)

Aspirations for 2011...

What do you want to do in '11 that you couldn't in '10?
Everything that I didn't do in 2010!

Any resolutions?
I'll be thinking about it ;)

What different thing will be about 2011 than 2010?
I'm not sure :) But one things for sure - 2011 is gonna be a year of huge surprises from God!! I'm so excited!

Anything you want to change about yourself for 2011?
Yeeeeeah hehe I believe God will be the one doing the transforming

Do you want to make more friends in 2011?
Why of course!

Things I've learnt this year.

1) God can make a miracle out of a mess
I'll admit that as much as I (and most of the world) try to attain perfection, I cannot. I'm a hypocrite, a liar, a gossip, a slanderer, everything that God warned us not to be - I'm a sinner. And yet, Jesus came to wash away my sins and to transform & change my heart from the inside out. Thats miracle-out-of-a-mess number 1, and I'm still trying to comprehend that. I've made so many mistakes, Jesus was there every single time to pick me up and wrap me in His unfailing love.. Every single time I made a wrong decision that I thought was unfixable, God came and amazed me with a miracle that only He could be capable of :)

"Unless the Lord had given me help, I would soon have dwelt in the silence of death. When I said, 'My foot is slipping!,' Your love supported me. When anxiety was great within me, Your consolation brought joy to my soul." (Psalms 94:17-19)

2) Jesus loves me as I am, He is crazily in love with me
This would be one of the obstacles I've come across in my Christian walk - Understanding, accepting, and believing that God made me as I am & that I am the apple of His eye :) That He actually loves me (literally to die for!) because He made me with His own hands. He's taught me a lot about myself! I used to have a hard time loving other people, but He has opened my eyes & changed my heart. We love because He first loved us (1 John 4:19) and that is really really true. I cannot even make claims that "I Love," or that I know love, or that I understand love. but yes, I am learning about Love; I am learning to love - out of the heart of God :) Every single time I took a step of faith and trusted Him, I could feel His joy that I was willing to give Him bit-by-bit of my heart. Jesus literally rejoices in the Heavens with the angels when You decide to make Him the number one thing in your life above everything else... Trust me :)

"The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in You, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing." (Zephaniah 3:17)

3) He was always there, and He always will be
This is pretty self explanatory... He's always there. And it became so real to me that He is real when I started seeking Him. Its true when the bible says seek Him and He will be found by you. This year He was there in the little things and the big things and the important things and the unimportant things, and I saw God's faithfulness as He walked beside me the whole way.

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." (James 1:17)

So far those 3 things are what stood out for me the most this year. Its different for everyone, but I'm sure we can all agree that our God is a miracle-maker, a wonderful lover & a faithful father! Am I right, or am I right? ;)

Its coming to the end of the year 2010. The end of the year is something I always look forward to, as a time of reflection on the year that has just passed & the anticipation of the new and fresh year that is to come! Looking back on my journal this year, I realise God has brought me through every single situation and He was always there for me even when I didn't know it :) Here are pieces of my heart from each month taken from my journal. Each piece is precious, although sometimes painful just like glass shards are, nevertheless there is beauty in each moment.

7th March 2010, Sunday.

Pastor Ben came and prayed for me. The words he spoke were things I didn't even consider important in my life, but when he said them they cut right to the heart. He said I shouldn't find my value in other people. My value is not found in what other people think and say of me, my value is in Christ Jesus. He said sometimes I look at other people and wish I were like them. I wish I looked like them or acted like them. But thats wrong - I should not be trying to find my identity in other people because my identity is in Christ.. And that is amazingly true.

29th April 2010, Thursday.

Once again, I am so amazed by God's perfect love. I'm in awe that someone as pure & perfect as Him would actually die for my sake. Someone who was righteous in every way came and died for a sinner like me. Hows that for unconditional love? His love, grace and peace has no boundaries and I'm so glad that I have Him living in me!

30th June 2010, Wednesday.

Waking up early to read the Bible these past 2 days has been absolutely tiring.. I have to constantly ask for strength. As I read the bible, I see many things. All the rulers who were successful in their reign did these things

1. Humbled themselves
2. Repented and
3. Offered sacrifices / Rebuilt the temple of the Lord

I guess this really shows something and speaks to me. If I am ever going to be successful, I cannot do it without humbling myself, repenting and sacrificing my idols.

14th August 2010, Saturday.

Tania and I got into a discussion about our walk with God and we shared some bible verses. Tania suddenly told me she thinks God is telling her to tell me that I should persevere and it really did touch my heart. Somehow I realise that I cannot rely on my emotions and I cannot rely on my feelings, but I have to rely on God's faithfulness. He is faithful when He says He will never leave us not forsake us, even when we're dry. He wants me to depend on Him and entirely Him.... and He makes it so real in my life when He said, "Apart from Me, you can do nothing."

28th September 2010, Tuesday.

Jeremiah 42:6. I've been telling God that I'm willing - willing to do His will. Now I feel that He's asking me - Am I still going to be willing when I face the unfamiliar? Am I still gonna say, Lord, I am willing to do your will? Am I still going to be obedient? This is difficult for me, I'm kinda ashamed to admit it! The things of my sinful nature holding me back, caring too much about what other people might think of me or what they would say.

But this is a choice I'm going to have to make NOW. Christ paid too big a price for me to say, "Wait."

24th October 2010, Sunday.

"I was pushed back and about to fall,

But the Lord helped me.

The Lord is my strength & my song;

He has become my Salvation." (Psalms 118:14)

13th November 2010, Saturday.

Time to let go and put things that are out of my control and place it in the hands of the One that has control. I'm tired of thinking and trying to fix things, I've come to realise that I can't do anything without You. What am I doing, God? Why am I taking my struggle out of Your hands when I'm supposed to be doing the opposite? Its time to turn to You. Jesus, thanks for your faithfulness.. Please help me to see beyond what I can see. :)

I looooooooove looking back, because it gives me a chance to see that God was right there all along, loving me and holding me up with His amazing unconditional neverending wonderful love!! Every single lousy situation, fun party, terrible day, exciting moment, turbulent storms, THEY ALL PALE IN COMPARISON TO THE AMAZING GOD I SERVE :)

Christmas Eve.

Jesus, let me not be swept away in the excitement of Christmas :) Of the swirl of crinkly wrapped presents, glittery christmas trees, shiny ornaments & delicious food all prepared for the purpose of Christmas. Remind me that above all this happiness of sharing the season with the beloved friends and family you've blessed me with, there is a greater joy in Christmas - In remembering Your birth, of when you came to earth to save the lost and to bring mercy to the sinners. Thank You for never forgetting me; help me to never forget You!

Daniel is back :) We were at theJunk for dinner last night. Apparently, Kennysia was there somewhere around the same time as we were there, but we didn't notice him. Oops.. And also, Anthony Bourdain has also eaten at theJunk! Pictures on the wall :D He looks perpetually drunk.

Painted a red christmas tree on my nail :) Because I didn't have green nail polish, I had to use red.. Skills! Hehe.

Woke up this morning forgetting that it was PMR results day. So the results came out around 9am, and I only arrived to get my results at 11am... Anyway, I got straight A's, really thank God for it :) I know no matter what my results are (whether good or bad), God always has a plan and purpose for everything and He should still be praised no matter what I'm feeling! Thanks Jesus :) I'm giving You all the glory.

I saw this picture on weheartit, and I just knew I had to colour it in :) If anyone knows who the artist is, please please please tell me! I'd love to give credits to the person who drew this amazing picture.

About half an hour on Photoshop CS3. I haven't used my tablet this entire year for something like colouring so it felt rather awkward to use. I think this is the first time I've finished colouring a piece on photoshop cause I don't like using Photoshop for drawings. OpenCanvas is my favourite choice, but it sort of got deleted when I changed computers D: D: ANYWAYYY haha colouring is really fun even if I'm not amazing at it! For half an hour I think I did a pretty decent job *pats self* Hehe

Is it just me or does that girl remind you of Lindsay Lohan?